I really should be cleaning or playing with the kids at least but I'm on my second cup of coffee. Thinking about what I oughtta be doing. I have restarted my commitment to the flylady
She is really bossy some days, but if you listen, your life gets fixed right up.
Only it works like this for me: Monday: wash your sheets, dust, vacuum, mop and gather trash
Tuesday: No "big" assignment so usually I think about doing what I was supposed to do on Monday.
Wednesday: Plan menus. When I actually do this I sit down with a piece of paper... maybe at the computer. Stare at the sale ads. Stare at a pile of coupons or better yet search for printable coupons online. Try to download some mysterious coupon printer. Take apart the printer to see why it isn't connecting to the computer. Search for recipes that coincide with both a coupon and what's on sale. Try to figure out if anyone would even eat all the strange things I come up with.
Thursday: Go to the store for groceries.
Remember that Thursday morning is the worst time for shopping since everybody already bought the good stuff and the new truck isn't unloaded yet. Ditch coupons. Ditch menus. Buy 18 cans of sloppy joes. Buy economy pack of buns. Forget to buy hamburger.
Friday: Realize I have forgotten to do all of the other stuff I was supposed to do. Yell at the kids for leaving their shoes all over. Pick up 17 pairs of my own shoes laying all over. Sweep up Monday's cheerios off of the kitchen floor. Decide to wait until next week to mop since it isn't technically the day for that.
Saturday: Family fun day! Whoo hoooo. don't have to do nothin.
The education on being civilized has been interesting to say the least.
So if you are getting ready to shed your rural status and head into the high life here are a few pointers:
Starting with the obvious: You cannot pee in your yard in town
Grass is as easy to grow as goat-head stickers as long as you have a sprinkler system and a teenager to mow
side note: we have killed a few spots, but only to give the rest of the grass warning as to who is in charge around here
side note #2-I guess that's what the different bullets mean-butanyways...if you don't follow the tip about peeing, you will end up with yellow spots in the yard. At least that's what the neighbor said referring to his dogs.
You have to park the right direction in front of the house. Otherwise a police officer will tap on your door and your three year old will yell "the cops are coming!!" which makes you feel like you are more gangsta than you had thought.
Do not use the cool orange cones surrounding the missing pavement as sleeves for your tennis game. It is a possibility that a driver would be distracted by your awesomeness and drive into the hole.
for demonstration purposes:
Please note illegal parking job. Geez.
Fortunately there was no traffic the day of the demonstration
There are different ways of disposing stuff in town
Grass clippings go in a separate can from your trash. Then you shove that grass disposal can in your minivan after it has sat around for a week. You drive it to the dumping pile on the edge of town.
added bonus: a car that smells like fermented grass clippings!!!
Gallons of grease from boyscout pig roasting do not go out to the edge of your property for the coyotes.
After consulting various city experts, no one really knew what to do with all of that.
If you throw a tantrum at the park on the Fourth of July and your Mom drags you home and you lose your boots in the process, the great ladies at the town hall will return them to your front door in just a few days!
Lastly, your move to town allows for quick trips to run errands. If you wait for that "trip to town" you will become a hermit and have to hire a babysitter and spend a whole day running around!
May your journey to becoming civilized be full of wonder